Character cards and lazy afternoons
by Macmuffen
Summary: Rinoa and Zell borrow Squall's character cards for their own nefarious purposes. Also including: the many faces of Squall, the magic of the library, Selphie and Seifer in their free time and Cid wants to play with himself, uhm I mean his own card. Their's even a little Squinoa and hints of Seiftis and selvine.


Character cards and lazy afternoons 

Rinoa and Zell were stealtly making their way out of the Commander's dorm room.

"Hey guys what are you up to?"

Okay so maybe they weren't that stealth. The duo turned around and smiled sheepishly at the cowboy hat wearing gunman/whipped womanizer, yea he was walking oxymoron.

"Hey Irvine we liberated some of Squall's cards." Rinoa peeked behind her to see if Squall was standing behind her… he wasn't because that would ruin my story.

"The good ones? You know the ones that give him a really unfair advantage over everyone else?" The oxymoron asked way too innocently, which usually meant he was up to something.

Zell, who understood and respected the inner workings of Irvine's mind a lot more than what could be considered normal, started looking at Rinoa strangely.

"So like can I hold them." Yea the plotter was plotting something for plot's sake. My previous sentence would go along nicely with Irvine's **women** and guns persona if you switch plot with another four letter word… what I meant shot, uhm with two o's…yeah.

"Okay we'll let you play with Irvine and Selphie once we get to the second floor classroom." Rinoa was also starting to feel uncomfortable under Zell's gays."

"Peter can you and Jack please get off of Rinoa please." Zell commanded his gays, he won them from Seifer in a poker game.

"But I can play with Selphie and Irvine all the time." Irvine high fived Zell's gays.

"Come on Irvine." Zell also high fived Irvine later that night for that joke, they also giggled but that's was because of something else.

When they got to the class room Selphie, Seifer and Cid were waiting for them.

"Okay guys mission successful we just need to get them back before he finishes his meeting and wakes up afterwards. Zell you get Zell. Irvine as promised you get Irvine and Selphie. Cid here's Edea, sorry but you can't play with yourself." Irvine started giggling, I would too. "Because he doesn't have a card Irvine!" Rinoa defended. "Seifer you get Seifer and Quistus-"

"So Seifer is going to play with himself." Irvine giggled again.

"Shut up Cowboy let Rin continue before I tell everyone the size of your penis, o yes me and Selphie talk about these things." Seifer didn't even look embarrassed.

"Uhm okay moving on…" Rinoa tried not to picture Seifer and Selphie braiding each other's hair and trying on sundresses, yes kind of like you're picturing now. "Shelphie you asked for Laguna but you get Kiros and Ward as well because Squall had a sticky note on them saying they always needed to be together and lastly I get Rinoa and Commander Dreamy." Rinoa giggled girlyly because no one giggle manlyly, and she, you know was a girl.

Squall was done with the meeting and went in search of Rinoa and the rest of his friends, but mainly Rinoa. He first checked the library, because he found Ellone there once and was now convinced that the library had magic people appearing powers. Quistus was in the library and Squall approached her.

"Hey Squall. Have you seen Seifer I've been looking everywhere for him."

Squall just realized that he was searching for his friends, but mainly Rinoa, and found one of them in the library, but the library didn't work for Quistus…Seifer must have broken it.

Quistus saw that Squall had his thinking face on, which looked a lot like all his other facial expressions, and decided to look elsewhere.

An hour went by and Quistus returned unsuccessfully and found Squall at exactly the same spot with exactly the same facial expression, or maybe this was his 'I'm going to buy all the hotdogs again so Zell can't get any ' It's hard to tell sometimes.

"Okay Squall I know you're wondering why I'm looking for Seifer and you're going to figure it out eventually. I'm sleeping with Seifer."

"What and I was thinking of buying all the hotdogs so Zell can't have any and you come along and ruin my mood." Squall over dramatically stormed out of the room like that one time in Galbadia.

Quistus had her 'shot with two o's look'on.

Back at the classroom everyone was busy holding their own mini puppet shows, except you know with triple triad cards.

"O Seifer you're so much better than Squall with your gunblade." Seifer was wiggling the Quistus card and saying it in a voice that was supposed to sound like Quistus. Not that I know how Quistus's voice sounds I had to read the whole game for shot with two o's sake.

"Yea with my 'gunblade' hiehie, wait how do you know how Squall is with his 'gunblade'."

While Seifer was busy arguing with himself Cid was busy staring at the Edea card like a weird old guy, some people might say lovingly but it was actually really disturbing, like he would start playing with himself if he could. If only he had full life junctioned to Vitality hiehie get it.

Selphie had traded Irvine the Selphie card for Kiros and Ward, the people not cards because the cards weren't supposed to be separated. Irvine disappeared shortly after mumbling something about catching them all and laughing manically. Selphie was now humming here comes the bride while moving the Selphie card closer to the Laguna card.

Zell was pressing the Zell card against the 'custom made' library girl card and making smooching sounds like a four year old. The library girl card was made out of cardboard and had a picture of the library girl on it which Zell drew on it with pencil. The card also had A values everywhere except for the top which had a heart and was apparently better than A.

Rinoa had the Rinoa card leaning against the wall with the Squall card slightly bent to look like it was on one knee, this was actually an virtually impossible task seeing as the card only had a picture of his face on it and no knees whatsoever but nevertheless she tried.

"Rinny I love you so much and I'm so sorry I got upset when you said that Lionheart isn't looking as bright as it did during its glory days and I should perhaps see if it has batteries somewhere and I'm also sorry I said we should break up after you said Hyperion is scarier looking than Lionheart. Sorry I'm saying a lot more than I usually am and sounding OOC but technically you're saying everything but that's beside the point. Rinoa will you-"

"Rinoa?"

Squall and Quistus were making their way towards the classroom since they searched everywhere else and already bought all the hotdogs. They were currently starring in silence at the scene in front of them.

Quistus was staring at Seifer who was pleading in a high voice and screaming in a deep voice. Squall meanwhile was staring at Rinoa with a 'she found what I was hiding under my insanely impressive card collection' look.

"Rinoa?"

Everybody instantly dropped the cards and stared fearfully at Squall, Selphie even mouthed shot with two o's.

"Uhm can I speak with you privately?"

"O-ok S-Squall." Rinoa saw that Squall now had his 'busted' face on.

Squall took Rinoa's hand and led her to his dorm where they couldn't be over heard. Naturally everyone waited for a while and followed stealthily behind.

All the cards were left on the floor and Irvine chose this moment to return.

Okay now this gets serious because I don't joke about Squinoa… like ever.

Squall closed the door and smiled nervously at Rinoa. He opened his desk drawer and took out the velvet box beneath all his cards. Rinoa stared wide eyed at the box and he realized she had not seen this coming.

Oops.

He slowly opened the box and revealed the really engagement looking ring.

"Well uhm you know Rin will you-"and then she pounced.

Later on the bridge a sad Irvine was standing next to a very happy Xu who was holding all the character cards and Kiros and Ward, apparently he really sucked at triple triad.

Fin.

A/N Hi

Well this is actually my second fic. The first one is still in production I want to have a few chapters done before I start posting it. Just don't expect the next one to be like this one, it will still have funny bits but it won't be a comedy. What will it be about then? Wait and see. Hope you enjoyed reading this fic.

Matthew.

P.S. English is my second language so I apologize for any mistakes.


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